In Defense of Splitting Infinitives

(Written in November of 2006)

The English language has evolved over time, just as all spoken languages have. At some point in history, the infinitive form of verbs split into two words. It is the only language I know of which has this trait: the infinitive "to go" in English is "gehen" in German, "aller" in French, "andare" in Italian, "ir" in Spanish, and the list goes on. Infinitive forms are a single word, except in English.

There are other differences as well. Many languages have case systems, where the part of speech is included in the word itself, giving the speaker the ability to shuffle words around as s/he pleases to vary emphasis and tone. English does not have this ability, and sentence meaning is nearly always dependent on word order.

But English does have that very special infinitive. The two parts of the verb are not attached like conjoined twins, but free to wander as they please!

Of course, as word order is important in English, they can't stray too far. But look at this: an adverb can be placed in between the two parts, modifying the verb and allowing a tiny bit of play with word order without changing the meaning of the sentence! "To go boldly" becomes, dramatically, "To Boldly Go!" Yes! We can still be poets after all!

But there are those who denounce this splitting of infinitives, calling it "improper" and "bad English." It is true that we have developed this possibility, but we shan't be allowed to use it! Keep the two parts together, allow no modification to come between them!

For shame! Such an idea is comparable to a monkey one day evolving an opposable thumb, but being strictly ordered to use it as though it were only a normal finger.

Well this monkey isn't one for following nonsensical rules! I myself will willfully split infinitives, in all their various forms and tenses. I have frequently done so in the past, and will gladly continue to do so in the future. I may certainly be an English professor's nightmare, but I prefer to righteously think of myself as a visionary, a revolutionary, a liberal speaker of English who refuses to ever be held back by conservative values. I shall blatantly and boldly go where no grammar Nazi has ever gone before! Just try and stop me.